Random Emotions - This Hurts…..
I’m hurting inside.
I try to fight it and act like everything’s ok, but it’s not.
I’m dying inside.
I’m lookin in the mirror and I can’t see me my own face.
I’m broken beyond repair and I can’t seem to fix this.
What do you do when you’re burning and drowning all at the same time. My hands are bounded by the words that my heart feeds to my mind. I’m lying to myself thinking feeling this way is ok. It’s not ok.
I’m screaming for help but I hear nothing coming out of my mouth. I’m stuck in this pain. This pain called love. This love that was promised to erase all the pain. This cycle is vicious. It’s to much to bare. I want to end this now.
I’m climbing to my high place up in the sky. I’m slowly wrapping your words around my neck. Each word screaming it’s name in my ears. The meaning of these words now embedded into my soul, it’s fitting. The mouth you used to taste me with is the same mouth you used to rape me with. Violating my spirit and my essence. Tainting my mind and submerging me in guilt and self pity.
It’s my fault
I allowed you to ruin me. I allowed your words to be the death of me. My noose pulling tighter. My body feels lighter. Everything is brighter.